You know. I just remembered something which I have forgotten about.
Today is the 9th of September.
And, just for the record, the 9th of September two years ago was the day me and Trina got together. So, by the wildest chance you are reading this, Trina, this is for you.
First and foremost, I just want to say thank you. For all the little things we had in the past, and for the lessons you have taught me. I know that we aren’t really the best of friends, yet simply strangers again, I just want to say that you are still, my friend. It’s not that I still can’t get over you. I’ve more than put you down. But now, I really regret what had happened.
Sometimes, I wonder what would happen if we stayed as friends instead of getting together. Since we are still in the same institution, would we still be close friends if September the 9th didn’t exist? This is something I will always wonder for every friendship that I screwed up.
I know that you think that I’m a jerk, or coward. You probably still think that way. But sometimes, I wonder if we can just be normal friends again. I don’t even need you to see me as a proper friend. Maybe the next time I see you, I would be daring enough to said hi.
The story of us was a really terrible one. As probably many would have thought, and I now do as well, we really rushed into things. It’s awkward now, is it? But I don’t think I can ever forgive myself if I ever lose a friend like you.
Honestly, if you are reading this, I must admit that I have no idea why I am typing this. Perhaps it’s just my weird nature of trudging through the ashes of the past. It’s like a small little knot I have. Might not be that important, but it’s a little issue, see? What am I saying. I don’t even make sense.
Bottomline, I just wish that we are but friends again. Please, should anyone see this and have opinions, I would just want to say that she is but a friend, nothing more. I’m typing this for old time’s sake, and I just needed to let out what is in my head, because there are other things, other people that I am more worried about. So, just a little rant, a little post, a little reminder about a long lost friend who became an everyday stranger. So, if you are adamant that we stay as strangers and just strangers, I have no qualms. Afterall, I see you as a friend, nothing else. Promise.
Please don’t judge me or see me differently.. I just wonder about our old friendship.